Why Blog?

Several days ago, I posted a link to Facebook about my dad.  I took it down almost immediately.  "Am I just begging for attention?  Would I really have these conversations with people in real life?"  As I second guessed myself, I took the post down and spent a good chunk of the day and this morning thinking and wondering to myself, "Why do you have this blog at all?  You realize it's public and that this is archived somewhere on the internet forever, even if you take it down, right?"

After thinking about why I blog, I came to three conclusions:

• I blog for me.  I blog so I can remember how I felt during some of the highs and lows of life.  I write so I can see how the hand of God has led and sustained me through both the good times and the bad.  I write so that I don't forget -- how far I've come, how much things have changed, and how God has been with me through each step of the way.  It's fair to say that this could be accomplished by simply keeping a private journal, but in some bizarre way knowing that a small handful of people will read this keeps me accountable to writing and recording life in a way that I wouldn't in a private journal.

• I blog because stories are important.  Positions are polarizing; opinions can be discounted and written off.  But people's stories -- their experiences and what they've lived though -- cannot be discounted or invalidated.  I have no idea who this story will help if anyone, but here I am putting my story out there.  I fail (oh man, do I fail!), but I have the courage to learn from my mistakes and keep showing up.  I won't let shame or embarrassment hold me down or keep my story in the dark.  I will show up -- even when it is hard -- and tell the truth.  My story is a part of who I am; I cannot separate it from my reality.  This is my story, and while it's hard and messy and full of mistakes, I choose to believe that in some way it matters so I will tell it. 

• I blog because our greatest ministry is likely to come out of our places of our deepest hurts.  I've been depressed.  I've tossed out my career and my life plan.  My dad has been to jail, twice.  All of these experiences have grown me in the empathy department, and have helped me to relate to others in a way that I couldn't prior to me experiencing them.  I write as a way for others to connect to me and get to know a bit of what's beneath the surface.  I will trust the Lord with the results of that.