Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Humility

One of the things the Lord has been teaching me for the last year -- really since I've been willing to listen -- is how important humility is.  I feel like for me, so much hinges on approaching things with a posture of humility.  It's one of the things that I constantly struggle with.

Humble people are unpretentious and have an appropriately low views of themselves.  Contrast that with the proud, who have really high views of themselves and are arrogant.   Humility says, "I'm not better than you"; pride smirks, "I'm better than you are."

I'll be honest; I was in my office writing all about humility and how much the Lord has taught me about this in the last year and getting ready to post it on the blog.

And then I had to go to court tonight.  I was in an accident in July.  While I was fine, I did not have proof of my insurance with me when I was in the wreck.  In the town where the accident occurred, the judge wanted to meet with everyone who gets tickets -- you couldn't simply pay the fine and move on without meeting with the prosecutor.  Sigh.  While I was initially annoyed by it all, the Lord used this experience to show me that I've got a long way to go when it comes to humility.  A LONG way.

The courtroom was crowded.  The chairs were grimy and gross.  The people who were there aren't generally the type of folks I associate with.  The room smelled like a mix of smoke and stale booze with a hint of BO.  It generally wasn't pleasant.  I was immediately uncomfortable.  I then slipped into my old default response of being judgmental and arrogant.

That's when the Holy Spirit tapped me on the shoulder.  Ahem.  "Jesus died for them too.  You are a sinner too.  You need me, and you know me.  They need me too -- but most of them don't know me.  You all need grace."

And I did.  I really needed grace.  "Lord," I prayed, "Please help me to see them like you see them.  Please help me to love them."

And He began to work immediately.  "Sarah," he reminded me, "you have a support system.  Many of these people don't.  You could buy your way out of this and can pay your fine.  Many of these people can't. You were loved growing up, but many of these people weren't.  And you are loved by me.  And they are too.  I treasure each of them immensely."

And I was moved.  I began praying immediately, repenting of my pride.  Praying for them to know Jesus.  Praying for them to know the hope, love, joy, and peace that He gives freely.  Praying that the Lord would continue to develop a posture of humility in me.  Praying that He is quick to point out when I need to grow, like He did today.

I left the courtroom deeply convicted and changed.  Lessons come in unexpected ways and through unexpected circumstances -- even in an Elkins, AR courtroom.  I am so grateful.

For by the grace given to me I say to every one of you: do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgement, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you. -- Romans 12:3

PS The prosecutor dropped the charges and I didn't have to pay anything, which was a bonus.  I received grace upon grace in the courtroom today.  Don't think I will forget this day for awhile.

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